The Intimacy of Asking For What You Want

There have been times in the past, both in my relationship and with friends and colleagues, that I’ve felt ashamed about asking for protection or space or anything that might sound needy or demanding.

It feels vulnerable to ask for what I want or need sometimes. They might see me as weak. I might get refused and feel rejected. I might seem demanding and even if they give me what I ask for it could cause resentment or judgements about me.

The truth is, when you or I ask clearly and responsibly for what we want, it is usually everyone's absolute pleasure to give it to us. And what's more, because we've been vulnerable and present in the asking, we have also given everyone a permission-slip to be open and tender too.

When I resist asking for what I need, I remove the opportunity for the people around me to treat me lovingly, and worse, I suppress my own impulse to love myself by asking for what I need. I block the chances of love from both myself and others simultaneously.

It's brave to be vulnerable and it encourages generosity and intimacy with everyone around us.

What do you hold back from asking for? Please post below something you resist asking for and so indirectly refuse yourself. Dare to ask for what you want today and please tell us below what happened.

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